In which our hero further braves the jungles of ARTHIS 167, and encounters the rapids of Intro to Music Theory, Classical Piano, Japanese History, and the mall.
Try reading "Organicism and the Construction of a Utopian Geography: The Role of the Landscape in Anarcho-Communism and Neo-Impressionism". Upon first glance, it's a long title, one that takes a few minutes to sink in, leading your faithful narrator to wonder what he is doing (in general, that is). But slogging through, it's actually your basic tale of love and war, right and wrong, white and black, rock and roll. Excerpt: "In the end, then, the organicized, aestheticized utopias imagined by artists and anarcho-communists alike turned on the belief that by changing the conditions under which visual perception or social interaction occurred, one could likewise change the nature of those actions to promote social harmony and well-being. My cup runneth over and the dog ran away with the spoon."
Under all those big words is just a simple message trying to get out: "They wanted a McDonald's in France."
Onto the next: did you know that there was a period in Japanese history known as the Yayoi? As in Tony Yayo, the one member of G-Unit who is currently in prison, and therefore even more of a schmuck than the rest? Or wait, does that make him more "unit"? And there was a Japanese queen named Pimiko who bewitched her followers and looked like the queen from Aliens? And that you have to use math to figure out what a hundred-and-sixty-fourth note is?
As a preliminary assignment for "Music, Place, and Belonging" (a music class cross-referenced with cultural anthropology that talks about your music, your place, and your belonging), we are dispatched to "a mall of our choice". I provide the vehicle and brave the vastness of Southpoint with two classmates, who agree that the sticker saying "NUTSACK" that someone put on the side of my car is indeed funny. (author's note: the NUTSACK is not just a random saying....it's actually plastic testes that one can put on the back bumper of one's car to make it look, um, male. one of my classmates suggests that I replace the word "car" with the word "truck". I further suggest that I replace the word "testes" with the word "grundle".) Needless to say, the mall is frightening, but oh is there plenty of unseen irony to be found. Example: there are speakers sprinkled throughout the outside portion of the mall that are designed to look like rocks; upon passing these, John Cougar Mellencamp suddenly blares out "R-O-C-K IN THE USA!". Get it? It's no "Cherry Bomb", or "Little Pink Houses", but the song must fit the method of dispersal, no? See what a Duke education will get you? Free, unlimited use of the word "dispersal"! As in, "WHEN THE FUCK IS MY FINANCIAL AID DISPERSAL/DISBURSEMENT CHECK GOING TO ARRIVE SO I CAN FINALLY RENT 'NOTTING HILL vs. LEPRECHAUN'?!!"
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Suggested classes for our hero to enroll in next sememster:
Art 319: Phlegmish Painters of the 18th Century
Linguistis 234: Silly Words of the Middle Ages
Soup 101
Judeo Celtic Studies 210
Political Science 246: Getting Jiggy with Jingoism: The Rise of the Dirty South
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