Thursday, September 17, 2009

(----) in Russia Vol.25--Special One-Year Anniversary EdisheeUN

You know you're in Russia when this guy can get this girl's number. And that is exactly what is happening.

Throw your set into the air, and blur it like you just don't care.

Translation: "Mama, don't get an abortion!"

Romance discarded into my dumpster, next to which a revolving cast of dudes usually sleep, waiting to go through the garbage.

At a wedding I attended, a live bear was brought in to do tricks. Wearing a tutu and carrying a basket. It was one of those moments that made me ashamed to be human.

At the same wedding, a family of performers (man, woman, child) emerged after the bear and performed a bunch of stunts with doves, including using them as badminton shuttlecocks (to their credit, the birds would land on the rackets rather than being actually pummeled by them).

Live from St. Petersburg:

Speaking of birds, this man was relaxing with a frosty brew and a flock of pigeons at about 2 p.m.

This chopper is really just a bicycle with huge handlebars.

Nevsky Prospekt, 7 p.m.

Carvings in the side of a building that used to be a brothel; the statues were supposed to be advertisements.

The Neva river, evening.

Slogan fail. There are tons of labels on clothes here that are in really strange English. The best one so far is one that had a bunch of brand names followed by the phrase, "Me So Horny." On the front of a t-shirt.

Here you go, Ric. A tiny dog wearing cargo shorts and a "SWAT" tank top.

This lady was carrying two Louis Vuitton bags and one (supposedly) Louis Vuitton dog.

Now for a cultural lesson. This building is one of the very first rock clubs in Russia, located just off Nevsky Prospekt, the main drag in St. Petersburg. The underground rock scene in Russia was essentially raised here, and the place was slightly illegal but extremely popular. It's now an unofficial monument in the city. Probably the most famous rock band ever in Russia was Kino, whose singer, Viktor Tsoi, died in a car accident in 1990 at the age of 28. Tsoi is still one of the country's most revered icons, having revolutionized the concept of rock music in Russia and starring in some incredible films, "Igla" and "Assa." Here's a clip of Kino playing their song "Blood Type" at one of their final concerts in Moscow (note standing drummer, RB):

Graffiti from August 15 of this year on the wall of the rock club: "Tsoi is not dead. He just went on tour to Heaven."

Russian sunbathing. The style here is to stand, arms akimbo, and face the sun rather than lie down.

A sign at the Peter and Paul Fortress in St. Petersburg, which served as a prison and a military outpost in the days of Peter the Great. The sign is outlining all the things that are not allowed in the fortress. Let's take a closer look:

No marching off of buildings of any sort.

No sax solos.

No wearing a bathing suit. Also, your torso must be connected to your legs.

No tree breaking.

No drinking near lamp posts.

If you're going to drink, no breaking bottles.

No demonstrations, Hitler salutes or conducting of symphonies of any kind.