Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Finish Him!


I saw this on the Dan Ryan Expressway a few weeks ago. Perhaps it was being delivered to Brian Urlacher's house. Note that this isn't just Mortal Kombat 3, but the Ultimate edition. Among the changes from the previous version, "Sonya's MK3 Friendship, which had her waving her arms back-and-forth in a silly manner, is removed. Now she simply does her victory pose and a row of flowers grow out of the ground."

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

(----) in Russia Vol.17


You know you're in Russia when, well, there's this guy, who slid into this position over a period of about 30 minutes.


Or this bus.


Or this band is coming to Moscow when their brief seconds of relevance — strictly limited to the Big House viewing of a stolen VHS copy of their "unauthorized" biographical documentary — have long been expired in most of the rest of the world.


Or this strange mannequin is posted up in a shopping center, advertising exactly jack shit.


"Ladies, pt.1"


"Man in training"


"Ladies, pt.2"


So this club called Solyanka had a 50's dance night, complete with swing dancing lessons, greasers, ladies in hoop dresses and rockabilly bands. A DJ followed, clad in horn-rimmed glasses and a cowboy shirt, and rocked the dance floor with Elvis and Carl Perkins cranked up to ear-splitting, bass-distorting proportions.


This band was actually really good. They had their shit together.








Still at Solyanka. This guy opted for the laid-back look rather than embrace the nostalgia. He and his friends are taking shots. After this round, he started drooling.


Ah, the glorious, anonymous truth of graffiti.


All over the city, there are machines through which you can put more money on your phone. We don't have to deal with hellish contracts with Verizon or any of those fuckers. Just put as much money as you want on your phone wherever you are. This machine broke, leaving only this screen with which to greet potential customers.


This band from Portland, OR, called Panther came and played Moscow. They were really good; one guy on guitar, one guy on drums, and a lot of overdubbed tracks via iTunes. Regardless, they brought the energy. People were going nuts.


This is a *little* blurry, but hopefully you can make out the singer leaping off of his vocal monitor with his guitar behind his head.


"Resigned"


My courtyard, 6:30 a.m., during the Big House Partay.


At this huge warehouse club called Arma '09, this DJ, who started his set off with a techno remix of the creepy theme from "Twin Peaks," (not the title theme, but the minor-key synth part that was so often used to indicate menace) was approached on the stage by a roommate, who suggested a few choice cuts to play.


Said roommate was quickly detained by the scruff of his neck by this black-clad security guard.


Chocolate fool.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Erie Choir tonight, Friday Big House Party

Using this medium for band promotional purposes is apparently outdated at this point, but Kalb did it recently, so I will as well.

Erie Choir opens tonight for Robyn Hitchcock and the Venus Three. I'm pretty excited about it, having been a Robyn Hitchcock fan since I was fifteen-years old. I was introduced to the band by 120 minutes. Dave Kendall probably noted that his then latest release, Queen Elvis, featured REM's Peter Buck. Mr. Buck plays in the Venus Three. This is the second time I'll get the honor of opening for Mr. Hitchcock. The first time was the day following a Halloween Hackey Sack Crue performance accompanied by David Nahm. I was hungover and freaked out a bit, but David helped me get through it, even though I had been short tempered with him earlier. Thanks again David.

We'll play in some fashion at the Big House on Friday, along with Le Weekend and others....

How about them Heels?

My cousin Terence produced a film. Check out the trailer!

I really did not mean for this to come out like a Larry King column, but the years are taking their toll. Anyway, check out the links if you time, and I'll see you around.

Saturday, April 04, 2009

(----) in Russia Vol.16


You know you're in Russia when you get invited to a "home party" and the only participants are a woman in a black silk kimono, her mother, a dog that looks like Alf, a cat with big nuts, a man who wants to talk about Obama and a hookah.


Alf-dog.


Monster-dog.


Context fail at the Louis Vuitton boutique.


WARNING: DON'T DRIVE INTO THE WATER. (Perhaps this has been a problem at some point?)


Hairdo fail.


Security fail. These people had their window broken outside of our building. Note ubiquitous dog tied to fence, silently observing.


Leningradsky train station, night. (Duh)


As the digital age catches up with Russia, more formats become obsolete...


...but the devices with which to play them still reside on top of my fridge, left behind by the landlady.


Statue at night. Note the lovely spring weather.


Statue in the mall. Of a cleaning lady.


Camels! And pyramids! And a ... cow skull.


Rednecks have infiltrated Moscow! Apparently, 4 months' worth of melting snow creates enough mud for some good muddin'. Which is logically followed by a stop at the sushi restaurant.


Some awesome fliers that were posted on a wall downtown.


As this photo was being taken (in the men's room), the photographer was warned by a roommate that he was "really asking for it." True, but just look at this jacket!


SPRING IS HERE! JUST LOOK AT THE...BUDDING...TREES...........season fail.


Kitchen.


Went and saw Shnurov's new band, Ruble, again. This time was way better than the previous one. He rocked the house like a madman, and people were going crazy. At one point, the power on stage cut out, but he kept singing until the whole room was singing along and clapping. Quite the showman. Look:




As Shnurov was leaving the stage, my roommate snapped this awesome shot of him walking by with his guitar. The dude in the white shirt was a guard whose job it was to prevent anyone from bothering Shnurov as he exited.


And now, a scene from Brothers In Hypeness' upcoming production of "Why So Many Dogs?":
Igor (dog in middle): “Kostya, when is that fucking bus supposed to arrive?”
Kostya (dog on right, facing away from camera): “I dunno, man, it’s already late, should we take the metro?”
Igor: “Ach, I don’t have my metro pass with me. Where is the party again?”
Kostya: “I think it’s at Byelorusskaya, right? Dima, you got the Facebook invite, right? Where is this place?”
Dima (dog on left): “Dude, get your snout out of your ass … the place is near Smolenskaya. Who told you Byelorusskaya?”
Kostya: “Chill, bro. I got a text from Alyosha, and she said that Sasha told her that Lyudmila said she talked to Ivan already and he said the party was there. Shit, we’re gonna be late.”
Igor: “Guys, look, we’ll be fine. We could always just take a car. Look, here comes one now.”
Kostya: “Do you see a wallet on any of us? How are we gonna pay, man? Damn, my leg itches.”
Dima: “I told you to stay away from that Zhenya, she’s got fleas.”
Igor: “We ALL have fleas.”
Kostya: “I need a drink.”